When I was growing up, I spent a lot of time with my grandparents (my father’s) and with a family of sister’s in Knoxville.  Since there weren’t any other kids to play with, I ended up spending most of my time with people who were at least close to retirement.  And it was pretty cool.
     They’d tell me about the things that they did when they were kids, places they’d gone, people they’d met in their lives.  Sometimes, when you’re very young, you don’t understand what they’re telling you.  As you get older, and they fall away, sometimes you’ll remember their words like it was yesterday.
     Their stories, their words, people who grew up here in East Tennessee, probably shaped me more than any parables and punishments my parents ever gave me.

     I can remember a time when people were helpful.  If someone fell, people showed concern instead of walking around them like they didn’t exist.  If someone dropped something, someone would pick it up for them.  If someone was walking with their arms full of shopping, people would open the door for them.  If they saw someone stuck on the side of the road with a dead car, they’d stop, lend a hand, or, when all else failed, a ride to a gas station.
     Those are values that were instilled in me.  If I see someone lying on the ground, I’ll help them up.  If someone drops something — even money — I’ll pick it up and chase them down to give it back.  I hold the door open for anyone who can’t quite do it, and behind me for everyone close.  And if I see two guys trying to push a dead van off the road, I’m certainly gonna stop and lend a hand.
     East Tennessee, even Knoxville, has always been that way.

     Unfortunately, we’re getting a lot of people moving here these days.  Knoxville, especially, is a real-estate boom town.  People are moving here in droves, eager to pick up cheap real-estate and perhaps even know their neighbors.
     Local culture is changing from the open, community-based ideal that we used to enjoy to a selfish, greedy, don’t-get-involved mentality.  It’s starting to feel like Washington, D.C.

     I hate watching things go downhill.

     Tonight, after ordering a pizza at a place which usually takes thirty minutes to prepare one, I got there to find that they’d lost my order.  Now, I was starving, so I’d called ahead.  I told them no bother, decided to go up the street to a restaurant.
     As I left and started back home, traffic was heavy.  I had to wait some time before being able to leave the parking lot.  As I drove down the road, I saw two guys in their late 20’s, maybe early 30’s, pushing a van towards a gas station — with great difficulty, up a small hill.  I didn’t have a place to pull over and help, so I turned around and came back.
     I got out, and gave them the extra leverage they needed to push the van into the parking lot they were trying to get to.

     As I got back in my car, they yelled, “God bless you, man!  Thank you!”
     “No problem, guys,” I yelled.  “Hope it gets better.”
     “Man, thank you so much.”
     “You’re welcome.  Take care.”

     The sad thing is, at least 30 other drivers didn’t give damn.  Maybe they had to be somewhere quickly.  Maybe they were elderly and couldn’t lend a hand.  Maybe they just didn’t see them (*cough* right).

     So why was I different?  Why did I have the two minutes to stop and lend a hand where no one else did?
     I was born here.  I grew up here.  It’s what we’re supposed to do.

     We should be showing the influx of people from other places what it means to be East Tennesseeans … to know our neighbors … to have friends … to walk around giving a damn about someone other than ourselves …

     It saddens me that us East Tennesseeans are losing that…

     Quite honestly, I’d rather get taken a couple times than turn down someone who legitimately needs help.  You can sort of tell…

     Today’s our country’s most important historic holiday, Independence Day, July 4th.  It commemorates the signing of our Declaration of Independence, the document which began the American Revolution and outlined, in no uncertain terms, that our “colony” would revolt from tyranny and come into it’s own.
     Last year, I wrote about the history of fireworks during the celebration, mostly because I kept hearing people complain about them.  It amazes me how people can forget history and sentiment so easily…

     Fireworks are beautiful, large and loud.  A proud display can give even those with the hardest hearts a smile, and a small display makes us wish for more.
     They’re also one of my favorite things to take photos of — freehand, without a tripod.

     Last year’s complaint has this year been replaced by, “Why do we have cookouts and drink beer?”

     For the very same reason I enjoy taking photos of fireworks.  For the same reason we can drive over to a secluded place and set off a massive display.  For the same we complain about “our loss of Freedoms” so much…
     The reason is simple:

     Because we can.

     As Americans, we take for granted what’s missing most everywhere else.  Like it’s been said a million times, “With Freedom comes great responsibility.”  As long as we can continue to act responsibly, we’ll never lose that.

     Happy Birthday, America!

     Remember that old Police tune?

The sky turned to black
Would he ever come back?
They would climb a high dune
They would pray to the moon
But he’d never return
So the sisters would burn
As their eyes searched the land
With their cups still full of sand…

     I’ve heard the same line so many times, “It’s not you, it’s me.”  I’ve heard more than that … way more … enough to make many men feel they were God … and yet …

     And yet …

     …

     .

     *shrug*

     I don’t …

It’s funny to me when someone who you thought of as a friend will put money in front of friendship. Personally, I think that this leads you down the road to a very crappy worldview. But it is somewhat interesting to see how people will act over the essence of probable money. It can turn pseudo-friend into worse that foe; former lovers into insult slinging buffoons or business partners into vicious tax collectors. Unfortunately for me this is an overly large let down. For love of God, you would think that the loss of a loved or the end of ties one would cause all parties involved to want to remember the happy memories of the passed. Never would it drive a wedge between friends or even those you considered almost like family.

Why the reason for the sudden cutting of ties? Simply because one person received something from a loved one that was not a member of his or her biological family. This very seldom thing occurs when debt that should have vanished and be non-existent or sheer greed takes over the body. Now a person in this situation must deal with the repercussions of their own poor decision in order to fulfill a desperate need for attention. It is as if they never got enough time, money, or caring sentiments from anyone. (Which a majority of the other people involved know to be false.)

Second example, the insult slinging buffoon, however is also very similar in behavior to the scum sucking relative. He or she will differ in that during the separation process, he or she will sling names at your friends, family, and your own person. I for instance have become a “vindictive, selfish, unloving, unmotivated, immoral, c*#$sucking a$$hole.”

If I had not realized that this was coming from an insensitive, psychopathic, and lying cesspool of a person I would be taken aback.  I hate when a lover-ship sours like a nice white wine. At some point you never get what you invested. Nor do you come anywhere near close to where you started and it sucks the big one. By that point, the only thing unknown about the relationship is how long with the other party keep pestering you?

The worst candidate for pestering you is the business partner when that relationship goes sour. They are slightly more annoying since more of your personal finances tend to be tied into your business. In the same token there is fortunately more distance sometime since it is a legal partnership and can be broken with the assistance of a fabulous mediator. (Wonderful counselor, the prince of peace… well okay, maybe it’s not quite such a divine intervention, it just seems that way sometimes.)

Generally, the repercussions with any of these can (with my involved will,) end on a positive note. In the end the people who irritate or criticize me with no ground to stand on usually go away and leave me be. They quit calling, don’t e-mail, or write letters. Those who choose to drag it out, cause a scene, and raise a ruckus should seek professional help. Why not? Lord knows I will if I fall victim to dealing with any of these unpleasantries.

Remember: Beer is proof that God loves us and wants to see us happy.

Monday Melee

1. The Misanthropic: Name something (about humanity) you absolutely hate.

The obsession with the Great Green Evil… MONEY!  Why must everyone be obsessed with it?  Is it not possible to do without this concept in its entirety and still have a successful society?  Oh well, I suppose I will have to learn to at least live with this in some shape, form or fashion.  (Barring total armageddon or the collapse of society as we know it…  Which I can’t have, I love my computer… It allows me to keep in touch with people who are out of reach.)

2. The Meretricious: Expose something or someone that’s phony, fraudulent or bogus.

I will now offer a tribute to the bogusness of the town I so formerly was a resident of…  Now beyond time and space we shall travel back a few years.  Yes, you have now reached the time of the Wilks Bucks Scandal of Maryville, Tennessee.  Funny how the only newspaper article I could find was from The Oak Ridger and his name was changed. 

Hmm… Something fishy is afoot I do believe.

The Maryville paper quite possibly could have just forgotten about the whole incident for some reason.  What that may or may not be I will never know.  Although it seems kind of unusual for Oak Ridge to have made a report on the topic and no where else in the state.  I was there I knew what happened. 

The moral of this story is: Kiddies think twice before trying to defraud our glorious government because big brother is watching.

3. The Malcontent: Name something you’re unhappy with.

I am rather distraught with my total lack of faith in people that are around me.  It’s not necessarily that I don’t trust them.  It falls more along the lines of I seriously question their ability to follow through with things.  After all most people are easily much more easily distracted with things that directly affect their own person.

Secondly, I am let down by the lack of excellent and groovy living in the world.  With this lack of easygoing natural course of living,  life is difficult.  While I realize that for the most part life can be summed up from a quote in The Princess Bride, “Life is pain.” I require myself to think differently. 

Last but not least, on this note can’t we all just f*cking get along.  (I know I used the word f*ck, but when I used it it had more emphasis didn’t it?)   

4. The Meritorious: Give someone credit for something and name it if you can.

The rest of the reading world, well hell you made it this far.  Just keep on truckin’.

5. The Mirror: See something good about yourself and name it.

 The mirror broke this week, check back later… (I apologize for the complete lack of interesting and funny dialogue but  I’m just full of sour satire this week…)

On the other hand I did find a six pack of Samuel Adams Cream Stout… Boy is it yummy it really hits the spot.   Also it is great to blog by and as Moe says, “I highly recommend it!”

6. The Make-Believe: Name something you wish for.

Visible progress in four key areas (not the armpits, a**hole, crotch and teeth…*): my love life, unfortunate financial situation, extending the arm of friendship my daily grasp, and feeling as if I can’t quite fulfill the requests of friends and family.

* In most civilized communties, these are great places to keep clean. In addition, you can save time if you use the same brush for all four areas.

Thus is the conclusion of my Monday Melee.  You too can join in the fun by visiting The Monday Melee page and completing the steps.  Kick-start your brains on Mondays, meet other bloggers, and by George have a darn good time too.

     Now, Diva’s last blog, “Skank of the Week: Paris Hilton” was funny to me.  Most rational, thinking people think she’s a bit … well … Useless.  I mean, really, what makes her a celebrity?  Why the Hell should should anyone care, one iota, about her life in the least?
     Apparently, it’s because she’s rich, and totally enjoys making an ass herself, her family, exploiting the silver spoon, etc. etc. etc.  She’s a train wreck waiting to happen, a poster child for “Rich Bitch.”
     Everyone hates her.

     Free Speech comes to mind…

     We’re just past Memorial Day.  I didn’t blog, because I was busy living my life, being an idiot and having a good time.
     If I had blogged, I would’ve reminded people about all of the people who had died to make this a Free country.  Those are people who made an extreme sacrifice, whether they lived or died, that was dedicated to furthering our Freedom, or the Freedom of a given nation.  They’re people of conviction and character, who stood up and took action while others sat on their haunches waiting for the next episode of blah-blah-blah.

     I also would’ve reminded people about the ideals that those heroes stood for in defense of Freedom in this country.
     I’ve lived in a few other countries, some at others’ suggestions, and found out that Americans, as a whole, take those Freedoms for granted.

(Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NymRecFWgAs)

     You have the right to be offended.  You have the right to change the channel.  You have the right to read another blog.  You have the right to hate our politicians.  You have the right to vote.  You have the right to marriage.  You have the right to divorce.  You have the right to rant about them on a blog.  You have the right to free yourself of toxic people.  You have the right to file a restraining order against an abuser.
     So long as you’re obeying some pretty loose concepts of law and trying to be a decent person, you can do pretty much anything you want.  Nobody’s telling us what to do — we make our own choices, we lead our own lives, and there’s no Government standing over us to tell us what to read, what to think, what to express.
     That makes us unique in the world.  As much as people “complain” about the “loss of our freedom,” I’d have to say — go live somewhere else for a while, then get back to me.

     So it strikes me as funny, with all of those rights, how some people seem to feel think that they have the right not to be offended — how they might “sue” a blog for a deragotory comment which reveled no personal information whatsoever.  How they might file a gag order on a legal case to prevent it from being talked about, no matter how heinously ridiculous the case might be.  How they might file a “stalking” charge because someone put up a link to a video they didn’t like.

     Hippies ate a lot of Acid, pretending to be activists for Free Spech.

     So … What, uh … Changed?

     Remember Perry Caravello, the guy who’s so Internet Saavy he couldn’t even spell “youtube” — or get Johnny Knoxville name right — in a lawsuit?  This is to people like him.  It’s also to “celebrities” who might garner attention via research, and thus benefit, from a sarcastic dietribe…

(Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xPhje8wepyg)

     G’night, kids.

     God bless.

Tip: Zacque Hitchcock, who found these two perfect examples of video

Character is often regarded as a means to judge the quality of a person and their moral values.  I thought about this as a read the blog on the Borat Syndrome when my name was mentioned.  I finally figured out why I love the film so much.  It is a perfect cross-section of the sheer ugliness that make up the moral stature of so many people in our lovely US and A.  I now invite you to watch as the people go and sing along as if it was a Disney Sing-A-Long special.

Surely, with this kind of debauchery and social degradation in the film media, it won’t be long until sex everywhere you look.  Children hate their parents, other races, any sort of work, and their bosses.  The politicians will be crooked. As they try to swindle, cheat and steal not only from the people but from each other as well.  (Not to mention remaining stagnant during their term, so they do not alienate their constituency so they are re-elected.)

While I do think a serious look at the general moral character of the public needs to be addressed, although I am not suggesting overall moral change.  (I want to keep my rights and my firearms.*)  I believe this must be addressed on much more a personal level.  You know, like prayer in school and spirituality when in the public domain, left up to the individual.  The whole point of the “film” is not to anger.  Merely to empower the mind, so our unpleasant qualities can be corrected.  All I am saying is simply if you don’t study history, you are bound to repeat it.

*Do not think advocating stronger gun restrictions will keep people who commit terrorist acts or other crimes from finding guns.

     There was a movie called Jackass, but Perry Caravello is King of All Jackasses.  Take a look at this bit from his Legal case against … well, everybody:

SUPERIOR COURT OF THE STATE OF CALIFORNIA
FOR THE COUNTY OF LOS ANGELES

PERRY CARAVELLO, Plaintiff
     v.
JIMMY KIMMEL, JOHNNY KNOXVILLE, DAKOTA NORTH ENTERTAINMENT, INC., DON BARRIS, ADAM COROLLA, KLSC, 97.1., VICE MAGAZINE, MTZ.COM, BLACKHOLE PRODUCTIONS, PARAMOUNT PICTURES UTUBES.COM, and DOES 1 Through 100, INCLUSIVE, Defendants

Case No. BC372039
Filed: May 31, 2007

COMPLAINT FOR DAMAGES

1. ACCOUNTING
2. DECLARATORY RELIEF
3. COMMON COUNT (UNJUST ENRICHMENT)
4. FRAUD
5. NEGLIGENCE

[ skip to the good bits ]

FOURTH CAUSE OF ACTION
(FRAUD)
(AGAINST ALL DEFENDANTS)

[ skip to the good bits ]

     14. On or about September 27, 2006, plaintiff appeared on the Adam Corolla radio show as part of the promotion of the release of the DVD sales of Windy City Heat. Plaintiff was promise by Defendant JOHNNY KNOXVILLE that Plaintiff would be paid 10 million dollars if he placed his penis in a mousetrap. Plaintiff agreed to do so, and, much to his emotional tranquility and to his physical harm, was severely injured when the trap went on his manhood. As a direct, proximate result thereof, Plaintiff had to seek out medical assistance for said injuries, pain and humiliation. The afforementioned incident has without Plaintiff’s permission and consent been widely disseminated and circulated on the Internet, to his prejudice, humiliation and emotional trauama. The named Defendants did nothing to prevent the incident from happening at the radio studio, and actually filmed the event without his permission or consent.

     Ummm… WHAT KIND OF DUMBASS ARE YOU, PERRY?

     Children… Playground… One kids says, ”I’ll give you a million dollars to lick my spit off the rail!”
     The other kid licks his spit of the rail.  He smiles, and laughs.
     Everyone standing around says, “Ooooooooooh!  Gross!”
     He smiles and laughs.  He doesn’t expect someone to give him a million dollars.  He got the attention he craved.

     So what … You think the rules change when you are supposed to be old enough to know better?  Welcome to adulthood, Dumbass!

     I mean, Dude, your mashed your meat in a device meant to kill animals — what, did you think this didn’t include big lizards?  Trouser snakes?  Waxed dolphins?  You honestly think someone would give you $10 Million for mangling your missile?  Jamming your Johnson?  Pillaging your pud?  And how can you possibly fathon the thought that someone isn’t gonna make a video when you were the one STUPID enough to waste your willy?  Trash your torpedo?  Annihilate your antler?  Sabotage your schlong?  Toast your tool?

     That’s why you get the Asshat of the Day Award, Caravello: For going above and beyond the call of duty to prove that you could be a bigger Jackass than P. J. Clapp ever thought about!
     I’m glad you got a female judge — I’m certain that she’ll make the fallacy (pun intended) of your argument quite clear.  And maybe she’ll remember that P. J. Clapp is Johnny Knoxville’s real name…

     Seriously, the next time you have the urge to preserve your pecker, try not placing it in a mousetrap.

     By now, most everyone has heard about what happened at Digg… but in case you haven’t…

     The Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) started sending Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA) requests to Digg, whose user-supported community were giving kudos to some little cyberpunks who decided to post Cracks which would allow users to steal licensed content from HD-DVD movies.  These DMCA requests merely asked Digg to take down links to the crack-codes, which their community users had posted.
     Users on Digg revolted as the company began complying with the DMCA requests, and posted thousands upon thousands on links to the illegal material.  Eventually, Digg was forced to concede to the mutiny, as it put an enormous amount of pressure on the dotcom’s small number of owners.

     This pissed me off.

     Digg shouldn’t've had to exhaust their resources trying to fight this stuff.  And this is the downfall of user-supported communities on the Internet… And the users who think it’s a matter of “free and protected speech” are actually just a bunch of thugs.
     There, I said it.
     And I’m right.

     Let’s think of it this way:
     Some guy is standing at your local Mall passing out keys that fit the front door of your office, along with a flyer that has your Alarm code on it.  Is that illegal?  Yes.
     The same guy goes and puts your office key and Alarm code on the bulletin board at a local University.  Is that illegal?  Yes.

     But if he went home, and posted the information on the Internet, along with a precise method to guarantee that you could create that same office key using materials you already own, then some asshat Lawyer would claim that it’s protected, free speech.  And that is completely wrong, and defies all logic.
     So I have to ask … What’s the difference between a guy doing any of those three things, and passing out “key” to crack an HD-DVD movie?

     There is no difference.  It is illegal.  It has been illegal.

     And anyone who helps the guy do it?  Aiding and abetting.  That’s been illegal for a few hundred years.

     But money talks… You can guarantee that right now, over this controversey, a bunch of Lawyers will get together with a plan to make money by setting ridiculous precedents, becoming experts and what can only be called bullshit.

     It’s happened before.  For instance…
     It was illegal to trade child pr0n.  However, a lot of people felt it was okay to do it via the Internet, and had Lawyers prove their case.  The overwhelming excuse by Lawyers was, “It’s the Internet — it’s not real.”  
     *cough*bullshit*cough*
     Finally, a bunch of other Lawyers got together and decided to make a law against “trading child pr0n on the Internet.”  Did we need that law, when “trading child pr0n” was already illegal?
     It was a way to make a bunch of Lawyers a pile of free cash from an unsuspecting public who felt that giving Lawyers and lobbyists some money was the only way to make it end — instead of starting a grassroots campaign to enforce the existing laws that made trafficking child pr0n illegal.

     It really sucks that people won’t realize that.

     If you call someone and threaten their life, it’s illegal.  If you do it over the Internet, it’s illegal.
     If you have a restraining order against someone and they harrass you, it’s illegal.  If they do it over the Internet, it’s illegal.

     Why do we keep letting pedantic Lawyers tell us none of this stuff is real?

     Tell your Representatives: if it’s illegal in real life, it’s illegal on the internet.  This kind of Legal seperation has to stop!

     Unless it’s between two consenting adults…

     [ Maybe I've watched too much Penn & Teller ]

     Ya know, I have a lotta friend.  If we’re gonna co-ordinate a ride-a-long, I expect a lotta things.  Some people are gonna be there.  Last night, I co-ordinated a ride home, which, of course, didn’t happen.

     Can you say “FLAKES,” boys and girls?  (Yes, MULTIPLE.)

     I knew you could.

     Most of my friends are pretty responsible.  But I have others who are, for lack of a better word, flakes.  Sure, they can write a blog about how apologetic they are about whatever they’ve done most recently, but damned if they’ll ever just come out and tell me…. It counts just a little more.
     I hate it, when I’m out with friends, and I have to put up with the constantly vibrating text alerts asking for advice about ridiculous things.  “What should I do?  What should I say?  Where should I go?”

     Now, notice it’s only 11PM.

     *shrug*

     I would so love to be an irresponsible prick now and again, and not have to take any responsibility for my own actions.  Instead, I usually end up doing all the hand-holding.
     Now, the addendum to that is … I made the decision to trust the flakes,  anyway.  And, I sincerely hope the idiots got home okay.  *shakes head*

     Me, I made sure I did and got another ride.