Texas Congressman Ron Paul made a really stupid comment during the GOP debate tonight.

They attack us because we’ve been over there. We’ve been bombing Iraq for 10 years. We’ve been in the Middle East.

     Mate, have you looked at a calendar lately?  You do realize it’s 2007, right?  And, that, uh, 9/11 wasn’t the first time they’d tried to bomb the World Trade Center?
     Oh … and that guy, next to you there?  He was the Mayor of New York when that crap went down…

     Seriously, when you manage piss off Rudy Giuliani, who’s pretty well known for keeping an even keel, you should know you’ve done something pretty damn stupid:

As someone who lived through the attack of September 11 — that we invited the attack because we were attacking Iraq — I don’t think I’ve ever heard that before, and I’ve heard some pretty absurd explanations for September 11th…

     You made a gigantic ass of yourself on national television.  You also managed to bolster a great deal of support for your opponent.  So Ron, put your Asshat of the Day award on your mantle.  You deserve it!

     A dishonorable mention, of course, goes to second-time weiner, Fred Phelps, of the Westboro Baptist Church.  I won’t link to his “God Hates America” website, but I will, at the very least, copy the text of today’s “special message” from the Moron Majority:

WBC will preach at the memorial service of the corpulent false prophet Jerry Falwell, who spent his entire life prophesying lies and false doctrines like “God loves everyone”.  

There is little doubt that Falwell split Hell wide open the instant he died.  The evidence is compelling, overwhelming, and irrefragable.  To wit:

1.  Falwell was a true Calvinistic Baptist when he was a young preacher in Springfield, Missouri, and sold his soul to Free-Willism (Arminianism) for lucre.

2.  Falwell bitterly and viciously attacked WBC because of WBC’s faithful Bible preaching — thereby committing the unpardonable sin — otherwise known as the sin against the Holy Ghost.

3.  Falwell warmly praised Christ-rejecting Jews, pedophile-condoning Catholics, money-grubbing compromisers, practicing fags like Mel White, and backsliders like Billy Graham and Robert Schuler, etc.  All for lucre — making him guilty of their sins.

Falwell is in Hell, Praise God!

     Well, Fred, you wouldda gotten the award this time.  But, you’re a loser.

     Of course, that’s no news, now is it? 

     Sometimes, I sit and think…  Other times, I just sit.

1. The Misanthtropic: Name something (about humanity) you absolutely hate.

     If you’re a polite, generous person, people will try and walk all over you.  That’s a fact, Jack!

2. The Meretricious: Expose something or someone that’s phony, fraudulent or bogus.

     All that talk about Fred Phelps really got me going.  People like him, who twist around the words of the Bible to support their own ignorant notions, really tick me off.
     Pat Robertson did a long bit about God’s Wrath a little over a year ago.  Why, instead of showing any Christian concern towards Ariel Sharon, Robertson said the reason was, “God’s Wrath!”.  Sam Venable from the Knoxville News-Sentinel let him have it with a laugh, too.

3. The Malcontent: Name something you’re unhappy with.

     I’ve had an extraordinary amount of crap and drama dumped on me lately.  It’s changed my attitude a little … I don’t laugh as much lately.  The sarcasm’s starting to sound serious…

4. The Meritorious: Give someone credit for something and name it if you can.

     Oh, you who will remain nameless…  We’ve known each other for a long time.  You’ve always had my best interests at heart, even though the implementation wasn’t the best, at times.
     You’ve had a rough time with a lot of things, with someone dragging you into situations completely out of your control.  Yet, you still keep coming out on top.
     Seriously, if you’ll just stop and think about it, you’ll start to realize just how strong you really are.  You’re strong… you just don’t give yourself enough credit. 

5. The Mirror: See something good about yourself and name it.

     Patience is a virtue.  I’m finding out I do have some, after all.

6. The Make-Believe: Name something you wish for.

     I wish I was moved already…

Now it’s your turn.

You can take part in The Monday Melee, even make it a regular feature at your site by visiting The Monday Melee page and following the steps. Kick-start your brain on Mondays and meet other bloggers.

     One of the biggest things that sickens me about many “Christian” groups is their propensity to back up their wicked, hateful ideas with obscure Biblical references.

     By now, most everyone in the country has heard something about the so-called “Reverend,” Fred Phelps, of the Westboro Baptist Church — either heard about him personally, or the work he’s done as an Anti-American (”God Hates the USA!”), as an instigator of violence against homosexuals (”God Hates Fags!”), or as an instigator of hatred against Jews, Catholics, Muslims, Roman Catholics, George Bush, Jews, Women, Rye Bread, Israel.  Carpet, and your next door neighbor’s cat.  And Catholics.  And Jews.  And Fruit Roll-ups.
     What self-respecting Christian could possibly follow an asshat like this?  Apparently, up to about 200.  The number frequently changes, mind you, and could be as low as 15.

     The WBC is labeled a Hate Group by the Southern Poverty Law Center, and is rightfully on the Anti-Defamation League watch list.  The group is so hateful, in fact, that even Michael Moore and the Ku Klux Klan have attempted to counter them.

     He and his “faithful followers” have protested the funerals of U.S. Soldiers, and are now turning their vileness towards victims of Virginia Tech shooting:

WBC will preach at the funerals of the Virginia Tech students killed on campus during a shooting rampage April 16, 2007. You describe this as monumental horror, but you know nothing of horror — yet. Your bloody tyrant Bush says he is ‘horrified’ by it all. You know nothing of horror — yet. Your true horror is coming. ‘They shall also gird themselves with sackloth, and horror shall cover them; and shame shall be upon all faces, and baldness upon all their heads’ (Eze. 7:18).

Why did this happen, you ask? It’s simple. Your military chose to shoot at the servants of God today, and all they got for their effort was terror. Then, the LORD your God sent a crazed madman to shoot at your children. Was God asleep while this took place? Was He on vacation? Of course not. He willed this to happen to punish you for assailing His servants.

     But in reading the above, what strikes me most is that Phelps claims that God inspired a man to kill our children as punishment for our country’s involved in Iraq.  When I consider the fact that Phelps has repeatedly been anti-Muslim, I find his credibility in this case pretty weak.  But, apparently, anywhere from 14-200 people (discounting Phelps, himself) are able to ignore that little inconsistency…

     And to debunk it a little further…
     Back in the Garden of Eden, Cain became jealous of his brother, Abel, because he felt that God favored Abel.  While they were out in the fields, Cain killed Abel.  Why didn’t God protect Abel?  Was God asleep while this took place?  Was He on vacation?  Of course not.
     God allows us Free Will.  That was the gift of the Forbidden Fruit.

     There is Separation of Church and State in this country.  Religious Freedom is guaranteed by the First Amendment — “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion…”
     What that Amendment means is that they’re not going to come and shut down Mr. Phelps “Church” because his Religion and Free Speech is protected.  Put simply, they stay out of his domain, so long as he and his followers don’t take action on the garbage they’re preaching…

     “The hell with your flag.  The hell with your fag army, your fag courts, your fag-run government,” says Phelps.  “This is the hypocritical, fag-infested, fag-run United States of America and we’re supposed to respect that fag rag flag?”
     Yes, he is supposed to Respect it.  This Country, and that Flag that it represents, are what gave him the right to spread his filth in the name of Religion.

     I would also have them remember that Government will stay out of their Church’s domain only so much as their Church stays out of the Government’s domain.  With every legal line they cross while spouting their politics and hatred, they become less and less a Church, and more and more a Hate Group who spout Bible Verses.

Tips: Slublog, LissaKay

     Today’s Monday Melee is brought to you by the Letters A, K, and the number 47…

1. The Misanthtropic: Name something (about humanity) you absolutely hate.

     What the Hell snaps in peoples’ heads and makes them go on a rampage and start shooting people?  Certainly, I can imagine having one person tick you off so badly that you’ll seriously consider it.  But how do you get from that point to shooting more than fifty people on a college campus?
     That’s hardcore.

     And there are many, many more where he came from… people who have absolutely no value or respect for human life.

2. The Meretricious: Expose something or someone that’s phony, fraudulent or bogus.

     Earlier today, a couple of Mormons saw me pull into my driveway and came knocking on my door.  When I answered, they wanted to tell me all their story, despite my having told them, “I’m busy working.”
     It’s sort of amusing, really, when you consider that the basis of their religion relies heavily of the word of an angry teenager who was exiled from his Utah township.  Eventually, when hunger and the elements took their toll on him, he returned home with an elaborate hoax and was celebrated as a Saint.
     Seeing these two kids walking around, out of school and without jobs, certainly makes it seem that maybe, just maybe, that old tradition is alive and well…

3. The Malcontent: Name something you’re unhappy with.

     I am currently unhappy that I cannot find a pair of shoes anywhere near as nice as the ones I’m wearing right now.  They’re old.  They stink.  They’re falling apart inside.  But I can’t let them go until I find a suitable replacement.
     These were built extremely well, dress-style in Italian leather, with a boot-style sole that makes them equally comfortable as casual shoes.  They’re the type of go anywhere, do anything, all-purpose, sensible shoes which look just as good with a tailored suit as they do with a t-shirt and jeans.
     And do you think I can find anything close to that for less than $400?  Oh, HELL no.

4. The Meritorious: Give someone credit for something and name it if you can.

     I read a few of Diva’s blogs last week, and was pretty impressed with a few of them.  I gave her the opportunity to jump in here, and she’s hit the ground running with some pretty good material.
     Kudos, Diva.  Good job!

5. The Mirror: See something good about yourself and name it.

     Last week was tough, with the two court cases.  I was willing to negotiate in the first one to a large degree, but as they were unwilling, I still came out with exactly what I asked — and without having to bend over backwards.
     The second case was very difficult emotionally, and I got through it anyway — also in my favor.  I can’t take all of the credit, as I’ve surrounded myself with some pretty damn good people, as well.  They’ve propped me up when I’ve needed it.

     To the end, I attempted to make a lot of concessions and be reasonable with my family, which amazes me when I consider the Hell they were putting me through.  I tried to do the right thing, and was more than fair.
     At the same time, some of that probably has something to do with the fact I hang around with people who expect me to be that way.  I’m damn glad I’ve made the choice to hang around with them.

6. The Make-Believe: Name something you wish for.

     I wish I had written this earlier today…

Now it’s your turn.

You can take part in The Monday Melee, even make it a regular feature at your site by visiting The Monday Melee page and following the steps. Kick-start your brain on Mondays and meet other bloggers.

In this discussion of family, I will tell about a part of mine. Not to tell about my family as much as to tell a story of what this new technology is doing to parts of America.

My sister got a call from my aunt at the law office she works for. My aunt and uncle are in a very rural farm area of Tennessee and he is the pastor of a small Baptist church. If I told you the sort of stuff that goes on in his church you’d think I was making it up. Not snake handling crazy, but, yeah, you’d be freaked out if you went there. This is the uncle who, during a wedding he was officiating, stopped to make an altar call in case anyone wanted to accept Jesus as their Savior first. So, anyway, my aunt calls my sister in a terrible panic. My uncle was in mortal fear that he was going to lose his church. So much so, that he had written a suicide note. She wanted a lawyer to do something.

What that something is, we are still not sure.

The crisis is something like this. One of the guys who plays in the church band, has a rock and roll band on the side. Nothing like Super Satanic Metal Death stuff, just a decent rock band. And they have a MySpace page. And people are posting comments on this page and using foul language, and saying crude things like “You guys &^%#& rock!” This is happening out there on the Internets.

So, my uncle is in desperation and some sort of legal action must be taken and no one knows what to do and he may just have to kill himself about it. It’s just that desperate a situation.

Really.

     I post this against my better judgement… but I need to. 

     “All families are dysfunctional,” someone told me once.

     But in mine, everyone’s just waiting for the next crisis.  With baited breath, they look forward to the next time they can tear into someone at the drop of a hat, complete with neverending verbal onslaughts, pathetic lies and horrible slanders that would make even Jesus Christ Himself punch them in the mouth.
     Sometimes, those situations graduate from simple character assassination to theft, vandalism, burglary, and assault — on rare occasions, maybe even a vehicular assault or a shooting.

     You can’t defend yourself against it.  You’re automatically “a liar,” and there’s no way around it no matter what you do.
     They attack first, with righteous anger, and never ask a single question — or, at least, will never let you answer anything fully — ignoring the fact that there are two sides to every story.  Most of the time, if everyone would just shut up and think, they might realize maybe something wasn’t right about the situation to begin with.  Mothers, Fathers, Sisters, Brothers, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins… All ready to jump on you and split you apart at the seams.  How could it be right?

     “I’ll never love you!”
     “You’re possessed / the Antichrist!”
     “You’ve gone too far this time!”
     “You’ve always been worthless!”
     “I’d hate to be you!”
     “I’ll spend $100,000 to handle you!”
     “I’ll break every bone in your body!”
     “I’ll burn it up with you in it!”

     Most of this is from people who’ve never even been around the situation, have no idea what’s going on, but they’re ready to throw me to the lions for doing one simple thing: I took legal action to relieve myself of one of the worst instigators.

     Like I was told today…
     “You’re selfish!  You never think about anyone but yourself!”
     That might’ve actually made me take pause, had the two of them not come into my home, threatening that I’d better “drop the charges” “or else” a few different things were going to happen.  There aren’t many things more selfish than trying to force someone to bend to your will…
     As for my being self-centered, it would be pretty difficult to find anyone who’d say I didn’t bend over backwards to help people.  Or that I didn’t listen when someone had something on their mind.  It’s hard to imagine I could be like that, and still be “selfish.”
     Besides … Pushing threats and ultimatums down someone’s throat is certainly no way to advance any situation towards resolution.

     Families should stand together, and attempt to resolve things with civility and dignity.  You’d certain expect it to be that way from a bunch of people who claim to be more righteous than the Pope.
     In situations where one person has been wholly unreasonable, attempts at resolution by a family can serve the purpose of quelling some of the insanity, and if not, at least give some insight as to where the problem lies…

     Instead, I have to deal with this blood-thirsty excuse for a family, and put up with the aftermath of a situation created by a person who isn’t taking any responsibility for any part of this situation…. a person who’s been running around to everyone in the family gaining support with a tear and a sob story.
     For my part, I’ve tried not to drop to that level.  It’s none of the family’s damn business, anyway.  The situation doesn’t concern them at all.  It’s just an excuse to do what they typical do: go on a Holy Crusade, and nail someone else to a cross.

     A family like that, who won’t even get my side of the story before they start ripping me apart in that old familiar way, that’s what I got. 

     I’ll tell ya one thing: I don’t need that in my life. 

     I have enough stress.

     It’s a wonder they never realized that maybe that was the reason I’ve moved all over the world and kept my distance from them…

     …and their “religion.”

     Sometimes a picture is worth a thousand words…

     And in case see it and think, “No way! Someone’s been messing with the sign!” the Spanish Translation on the other side would prove otherwise…

     Sometimes modern translations can be a little … ummm … too modern.  ;-)  Before anyone drives to Memphis to rip Pastor Whalum a new donkey-hole,  check out this bit from the KJV:

Mat 21:1 And when they drew nigh unto Jerusalem, and were come to Bethphage, unto the mount of Olives, then sent Jesus two disciples,

Mat 21:2 Saying unto them, Go into the village over against you, and straightway ye shall find an ass tied, and a colt with her: loose them, and bring them unto me.

     See?  It was innocent afterall … but good for a laugh, anyway. 

Photo Credit: Chris Davis of the Memphis Flyer. Good stuff, guys!

I recently cleaned out some of my old hard drives and found something I wrote a while ago but never shared.  A little something to think about when things get you down, moonbats drive you nuts, or you are fed up with everything.  

A Simple Analysis of 20th Century Thought:

• Capitalism, he who dies owns the most toys wins.
• Hari Krishna, he who plays with the most toys wins.
• Catholicism, he who denies himself the most toys and little boys wins.
• Anglican, the boys were our toys first.
• Atheism, there is no toy or boy maker.
• Polytheism, there are many toy or boy makers.
• Evolutionism, the toys made themselves.
• Church of Christian Scientist, we are the toys.
• Communism, everyone gets the same number of toys and you are in big trouble if we catch you selling your toys or playing with them.
• B’hai, all your toys and are fine by us.
• Amish, toys with batteries are surely a sin.
• Protesting Moonbatism, war toys are evil.
• Good Ole Lefty, toys that are violent are to be rounded up and put into camps in order to become nonviolent toys.
• Taoism, the stuffed rabbit is as important as the dump truck.
• Mormonism, every boy can have as many toys as he wants.
• Voodoo, let me borrow that doll for a while.
• Hinduism, he who plays with plastic farm animals loses.
• Seventh Day Adventist, he who plays with toys on Saturday loses.
• Southern Baptist, if your toy is Disney product, you have a one-way ticket to hell.
• Jehovah’s Witness, he who sells the most toys door to door wins.
• Pentecostalism, he whose toys can speak wins.
• Existentialism, toys are a figment of your imagination.
• Confucianism, once a toy is dipped in the water, it is no longer dry.
• Non-Denominationalism, we don’t care where the toys come from lets just play with them.
• Agnosticism, it is not possible to know whether the toys make a bit of difference.
• Unitarian Universalism, we still have not decided if the toys exist, much less how, where, or who made them.

Isn’t that nice?

Today, on my way back to my office I happened to catch National Public Radio’s Evening Edition. The story was about a new web reference source in response to Wikipedia. Evidently there are a group of individuals who believe Wikipedia to be too liberal. I am not saying that this group of individuals is wrong, but they came to this conclusion based on the statistics of a poll by Wikipedia editors.

There are several bits of flawed logic with this idea. The assumption that the editors of Wikipedia aren’t human because as a straight set of data this poll would leave no room for human error or a lack of honesty. These facts are statistics. Statistics by nature can be used to sway one way or another. If not lawyers wouldn’t be so profitable. However, the major problem with consevapedia.com, is the misuse of the word conservative.

The main example can be shown by comparing the definitions of the word kangaroo on both sites: Wikipedia and Conservapedia. Okay, I am fine with either of them until I get to the Origins section of the Conservapedia definition. The first thing listed is a creationist theory explanation. That in itself was fishy enough for me to check the dictionary for the definition.

The Oxford dictionary (I would have used Merriam-Webster, but the link wouldn’t pull up) states that a conservative is “(in a political context) favoring free enterprise, private ownership, and socially conservative ideas.” If this is the case then where does interjecting religious beliefs into the origin of a species come into play? A true conservative world should not include religion. Religion is much more defined either one way or another.

Conservapedia.com even goes on to say “A conservative is one who adheres to principles of limited government, personal responsibility and moral virtue.” Where does this give them the right to inteject a secular religious viewpoint, much less stake a claim of moral virtue? If they are truly conservative should they not list the scientific information first?

With that in mind I would like to propose a new web address for this website: severelyscrewypedia.com

     As if Monty didn’t have enough to say about Intelligent Design last year… Check this out… 

     SayUncle Interviews TN State Senator Raymond Finney:

SayUncle: Let’s get the question everyone is wondering out of the way: are you retarded?

Senator Finney: Uh, no.

     Oh yeah, that rules. 

     The “Yeah, God put those [dinosaur] bones there to test our faith,” bit was hilarious.  I can remember hearing that when I was a kid from several people, being that I was such an avid Paleo-archaeologist at the age of six.
     The simple explanation was that there couldn’t have been any dinosaurs, since they weren’t mentioned in the Bible.  Strangely, neither were Planets, Meteors or Giraffes, so they must not exist, either.  *shrug*