Bitch about this, bitch about that.  That’s life, that’s what all the people say.  You’re ridin’ high in April and shot down in May, right?

     “I’m gonn pay you ________.”

     “I owe you ________.”

     “Next week, I promise!”

     If ONE of those people had said, “Mark, I can’t afford it!” it might’ve been different.  I mean, even if it’s fiction, it’s better than just a flat out “promise,” right?

     Sorry, but like everyone else, I get sick of hearing that shit after months, because I’m relying on those promises and cashflow myself…

     So I’m gonna keep drinking beer and pretending to write. 

     Until further notice…

Note: I moved the off-topic remainder of this post the “The Fuckit List”

     Me: “Why does this keep happening?  Work my ass off for a client, don’t get paid, and suddenly it’s all twisted into me being the bad guy…”
     Voice: Desperation… so strong a need that you impair your own judgement and do business with people you know are going to take advantage.
     Me: “Need clouds judgement… ”
     Voice: …so you must stop making choices based on desperate need and begin establishing beneficial, long-term connections…
     Me: “Get out of survival mode…”
     Voice: …and stop trusting out of necessity rather than trusting logically.
     Me: “But they’re still asshats…”
     Voice: Then stop dealing with asshats.

     Me: “Duplicitous… Four months ago you told me not to let my head rule my heart.”
     Voice: That was different.
     Me: “Why?”
     Voice: You should never talk yourself out of faith in the things that make you happy.
     Me: “And if I don’t, and I’m still unhappy?”
     Voice: Are you?
     Me: “It fell down again…”
     Voice: Then you should ask yourself much you helped it along.
     Me: “Every second of every day.”
     Voice: You didn’t learn the first time, did you?
     Me: “Learn what?”
     Voice: Happiness should never be questioned.  Accept it, and it’s yours.

[ Originally posted as a blog on September 30th, but removed. Then Mark posted his about same John Nichols guy earlier this week. ]

It has come to my attention that some business or business owners rather are not worth fooling with. The owner of two such companies is one of those people. He cannot seem to pay for things he requested like the registration and hosting of a Catalyst X project, KnoxRhino.com, nor can he seem to honor the arrangement set up my one of his employees so they could have a photographic record of the work they produce in the shop.

Personally, I think I should have realized this earlier, by the way he treats his own son. On numerous occasions I have seen him demeaned. If I have seen it, the customers of these companies must have seen it. The following is an excerpt of electronic communication between the two of them, showing the true colors of this business owner:

I want to address several additional issues with you since we have not been able to sit down and have a conversation.

which was followed retorted with:

You say that I don’t trust you. The fact is you are correct and here are the reasons why:

This is a great way to start an e-mail to an employee… NOT! If you don’t trust them, why when Tennessee has an 8% unemployment rate would you hire them in the first place? In addition this employee/employer correspondence is between a father and son. I thought the only father and son e-mails like this exist only in Mark’s life. This is also unacceptable.

To top it all off, this man decided to string Mark and I along for several months.

In a meeting in his office at 6336 Clinton Highway, the site of the Mr. Transmission #337, Mr. Nichols requested services and quotes for said services. They were then promptly stated and followed up by e-mail. The first of these was regarding the hosting of www.knoxrhino.com, the “proof” he requested in order to demonstrate the abilities of Catalyst X. After he was billed, he refused to pay, even though he requested these things to be done saying to in a reply to his son “You do not have the authority to have this done.” This was only done per the owner’s request and registered under the son’s name and e-mail address for contact.

The second e-mail was regarding the graphic design for business cards and other marketing materials. Although the owner did not request it, a follow-up e-mail was sent since I had not received a response in a few months. Following this e-mail were several on-sites to discuss the design and an additional e-mail. Three weeks afterwards I received a forwarded e-mail from the son again requesting these quotes.

So after that I called this man. I said, “Owner, how many times must I send you a quote? I have sent this in e-mail twice and visited you multiple times.” It was as if this fell on deaf ears. Today I get a phone call from the son. The son says, “Dad says you shot yourself in the foot. You forgot your place since he is the customer.” I am sorry but over a six month time period and multiple quotes, if you don’t want my services, tell me. Most of all DO NOT slander my name in front of one of my best customers, your son. This is the kind of thing lawsuits are made of.

In conclusion, Mark, his son, and I do not seem to be the only ones who have problems with this man. It turns out the Better Business Bureau and several customers do as well. So if you would like an alternative to Transmission and Car Repair, please feel free to contact me at the blog. For truck bed linings or any other service that might require a polyurethane covering let me suggest Line X of Knoxville.

Good luck with your endeavors Mr. Business Owner.

I hope that some day soon you can be taken off the list of asshats, but until then I raise my glass to toast you.

Shortly after turning my own ass to fart in your general direction.

     This John Nichols guy is a special kind of asshat.  His misdeeds span across a mutitude of levels, and a couple of different companies, namely his Mr. Transmission business (aka Mr. Transerv 100, Inc. dba Mr. Transmission / MILEX) & Rhino Linings of Knoxville.  Knowing that another friend of mine, a photographer, has been repeatedly screwed by this, and knowing that in his Rhino Linings business he tried to screw me out of the hosting bill, I have no idea why I thought doing any sort of business with this asshat was a good idea.
     Except that I need the business these days…

     I know at least one person who works for Mr. Transmission on Clinton Highway in Knoxville, and so I dropped by last week to see if they could get the rusted clamp off my muffler since I didn’t have a die grinder or a dremel handy, and I knew they did.  But when I walked into the office, John Nichols son, Scott, said, “There it is.”
     “What’s going on?”
     “That computer is all screwed up.  Please fix it!” said Scott.
     “What’s it doing?”
     “It’s really slow, and its taking forever just to enter an invoice,” Mike replied.  “So please do.”
     “Ok,” I agreed.  After the last billing fiasco, where John repeatedly blames Scott, he’d told me that if he wasn’t there, Mike was in charge.  Mike authorized me to the computer, and so I went to work.

     I removed several viruses, several bit of spyware, several trojans, a fake antivirus program, and did all the updates.  During one of the updates, I asked them about the muffler.  Fifteen seconds with a grinder, five seconds with a hammer, and the rusted clamp was off.  They offered to put it on for me if I’d grab the parts.  I took off just down the road and grab a couple of muffler clamps and a 2.25 I/D converter.  That took fifteen minutes, but it was also during the time the system was doing a an antivirus and antispyware scan.  When I got back, they said, they removed the old pipe from the muffler, threw the converter in, clamped it all down and tightened it all up.  A whole fiften minute job.  Couldda done it myself, but I figured I’d take the price outta their bill.

     Once the computer was was finished, and I was satisfied that everything was in proper working order, I started writing up the final bill.
     “Hey, Mike?  How much do I owe ya for the muffler?”
     “Ahh, man, that was nothing.  Don’t worry about it, you don’t owe us anything for that,” he replied.

     I tallied…

Service (Onsite) – 10/15/2008
[systemname] Not Working – System slow and uncooperative
Infected W32.Magistr, W32.Backdoor.Gen, W32.Sality (not AA), W32.SDbot.ETA. Malware/Trojan ScreenView, HexBinAdWare, Virtumundo.Gen(Smitfraud). All Removed Manually, then re-scanned with Windows Defender & Spybot 1.6. Re-Enabled Regedit & Task Manager. Removed Damaged Malware / Fake Antivirus (Antivirus). Removed Damaged/non-working antivirus (Symantec Antivirus 2004). Removed Fake AntiSpyware (Spyware Blaster, RemedyAntispy). Software Updates installed (XPSP3, All Windows Updates, Spybot 1.6, Adobe Acrobat 9, Codec Pack)

     Two hours, at $125 an hour — that’s what I’ve charged for years.  $250 seemed steep given the assistance with the muffler.  And for that trouble, which Mike claimed I “didn’t owe anything” for since they ‘didn’t provide any parts” or “have to do any major surgery,” I knocked a half hour off and gave them a final bill of $187.50.

     On Friday, October 17th, John Nichols called me up cussing me out, telling me that he had already told me that his son, Scott, was not authorized to make decisions for his business.  I told him Mike authorized it, and John began screaming that Mike wasn’t authorized, that every bit of business we did had to go through him, and he wasn’t going to pay.  I cussed the guy up one side and down the other for calling and yelling at me and cussing me out.  He’s a lousy piece of shit that way.
     I printed out the bill, and at 2PM, I went over there.  I recorded the conversation for posterity.  John says he’s not paying, and that we’re even since they installed a muffler.  And that he was the only one to authorize any work or bills.
     I told him that he had said in his absence he had authorized Mike to make those decisions, and in a moment of severe WIMP-ASS, Mike tells me, “No, I didn’t authorize it.”
     And so, Mike, too, is a damn liar.  He didn’t authorize it?  He just told me what was wrong with it for the plain hell of it, and said, “See what you can do?”  And didn’t charge me for a muffler job, said that I didn’t owe anything?  Cool.  Mike’s won’t stand up to John.
     “Well, tell ya what, I either get a check, or you get a warrant.”  And I left.  And I was pissed.

     Ya see, that’s where our first fiasco happened.  Back a few months ago, John himself asked me to register their Rhino Linings domain and put up a splash page, offer e-mail, and prove to him that I could do SEO.  I offered to do that for him on the basis that he paid for the domain, $25 a month in hosting and agreed that we would do the final website in a content management system for around $2500.  He agreed, but his bill got up to $103.75 at the beginning of October because he hadn’t bother to pay for any of it.  I subsequently pointed the domain at this site for a couple of days for non-payment.
     On October 6th, he called me up screaming that his son had no authorization to setup that site, and I screamed right back at him that his friggin’ idea, and then went and picked up my check for $103.75.  He was apologetic, didn’t remember the deal we’d made (right), and told me then that if he wasn’t there, Mike was the only one who had any authority for any business we would do, that his son Scott would have no say whatsoever.  And that’s fine, I agreed, and he agreed to retain the website for an additional year at $25/mo., and eventually use us to build the final site at $2500.

     Now, this Scott thing is kinda pertinent, because this asshole goes off on Scott every second when I’m around, and I’m sure it doesn’t stop when I’m not.  He’s a beligerant asshole to his son, seeking to mock and belittle him in front of customers, other businesses, friends, etc.  John Nichols is a total piece of work… if you can call it that.

     It’s no surprise, of course, that earlier today, I received a bill from Mr. TranServ 100, Inc., dba Mr. Transmission / MILEX, owner, John Nichols.
     For work completed on 10/17/2008.  On a 1991 Oldsmobile Cutlass Calais. 

Shop Supplies, $3.51
Hazardous Materials, $3.99
Install Muffler, $187.50
Sales Tax, $18.40
Total: $213:40

     Sorry, WHAT THE FUCK?  That won’t even stand up in court.  No work was performed on my vehicle on 10/17/2008, which is clearly printed on the invoice.  I do not own, nor do I know anyone who does own, a 1991 Oldsmobile Cutlass Calais.  No parts were supplied, hazardous materials handled, or mufflers installed — however, on 10/16/2008, on an entirely different car, a muffler converter was installed because the pipe had rusted through, and the job took 15 minutes, and Mike assured me that I owed nothing for that.  And I removed a half hour from their bill?

     John Nichols clearly wrote this invoice to avoid paying his bill.  I mean, CLEARLY — who the Hell charges $213.40 to install a muffler that wasn’t purchased there and no parts were purchased for? 

     Only you, John.

     You think this is over, you are sadly mistaken.  I consider this a breach of our contract.

     See ya in court, deadbeat!

     Obama recently went off on McCain for his lack of technical prowess.  Meanwhile, Obama has “his people” set up a blog, a twitter, a MySpace, and bunch of other Web 2.0 garbage that I am 100% certain he has no idea how to use, himself.  And it really ticks me off, because it is then used to harrass and annoy people who don’t want it.

(Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bQ2I0t_Twk0)

     And this right here is where’s it’s an issue.  Obama keeps going off that McCain is “out of a touch” with technology and living in a world of twenty-there years ago, and yet Obama is out of touch with the very laws he’s being paid to help to shape and mould — and even then, doesn’t show up for work most of the time.

     Federal Statutes have declared that Campaign E-mails soliciting for donations fall under the category of “Commercial E-Mail.”  I have received no less than three of these e-mails per day for the last month — all from Barak Obama.  Despite my having opted out.  Multiple times.  To no avail.

     Here’s the basis of the Federal CAN-SPAM Law:

• It bans false or misleading header information.
• It prohibits deceptive subject lines.
• It requires that your email give recipients an opt-out method.
• It requires that commercial email be identified as an advertisement and include the sender’s valid physical postal address.

     And it appears that there’s only one of those items the Obama campaign hasn’t broken!

     Oh, and it carries with it fines of up to $11,000 per violation, raking in a conservative estimate of nearly ten million dollars that Barak Obama owes in fines, plus State Recompense and the FTC-Imposed Civil Fees, which means that Barack Obama owes me $45,900.

     So McCain is out of touch with Technology … Obama is out of touch with Law, and the spirit of it.

     Which one’s the bigger sin?

     No way in Hell will I vote for someone who’s as notorious as Sanford “Spamford” Wallace.

     So seriously, Mr. Ospama, stop adding me to MySpace!  Don’t follow me on Twitter!  And first and foremost, quit sending me these damn e-mails!  And get out that check book — I could really use it right now, so I’ll settle for an even $45,000.

The phrase “Make it happen.”, is one of my well known business mantras.  This doesn’t mean to make it happen all the time.  I cannot function when I work all the time and neither should anyone else.  It is a wonderful practice to also make time for one’s self.  Finding the balance between the two is the key to success.

I was reminded by this while one of my colleagues was celebrating his birthday last Saturday.  While he and I speak about our business ventures to each other quite frequently, we both live our own lives and carry on through seperate lines of work outside of these other ventures.  This night in particular, we were both celebrating.  In the midst of the celebration he brought up some business I have known both of these people for a number of years.  Thankfully, they both took my advice and the celebrating continued.

While there are somethings that I may say to try to do all the time, there is a time and a place for everthing under the sun.

     It’s well known that Swiss Banks are havens for asshats who wanted to hide all their stolen, Nazi gold.

     A few years ago, I broke a bit of code, using a Modulo 17 mathematical matrix, and created a way for Swiss Francs and Euros to be directly deposited into a certain company’s bank account.  Mateo Meier, President and CEO of Artmotion Ltd., never bothered to pay me for that trouble, nor followed any specifications on the web design job project he was given to make up for it.

     He owes me over two thousand USD, and a little more for the pain in the ass of collections.  His design worked sucked, and seemed more like an Office Online Template rather than anything that was done in Photoshop like he said.

     You’re a piece of crap, Mateo Meier.

     May you rot.

     When you say the word “committed,” several different things come to mind.

     Webster’s Dictionary provides the following insight into the word “committed:”

1. gave in trust or charge; consigned.
2. consigned for preservation: committed ideas to writing; to committed a poem to memory.
3. pledged (oneself) to a position on an issue or question; expressed (one’s intention, feeling, etc.): Asked if he was a candidate, he refused to be committed.
4. bound or obligated, as by pledge or assurance; pledged: committed oneself to a promise; committed to a course of action.
5. entrusted, esp. for safekeeping; commended: committed her soul to God.
6. did; performed; perpetrated: committed murder; committed an error.
7. consigned to custody: committed a delinquent to a reformatory.
8. placed in a mental institution or hospital by or as if by legal authority: He was committed on the certificate of two psychiatrists.
9. delivered for treatment, disposal, etc.; relegated: committed a manuscript to the flames.
10. sent into a battle: The commander has committed all his troops to the front lines.
11. Parliamentary Procedure. refered (a bill or the like) to a committee for consideration.
12. pledged or engaged oneself: an athlete who has committed to the highest standards.

     Now look at this picture:

     Which one(s) apply?

     For a few years, my Messenger has been filled with so-called Customers who bother me whenever I get online.  They ask for help, often ask me to login to their servers remotely and fix things, and when it comes time to pay, I get the old, “When I make money, you make money!” thing.

     It ires me to no end.

     A few others have said, “Hey, we’ll pay you $x to do this website for us,” and then used the old, “We haven’t been paid for it yet,” trick.  Months pass, my questions get ignored, and then they have the balls to come and ask me to do more things for them.  And stupidly, I have.

     Still others have said, “We’re hiring you at $x a week, and we expect at least y hours out of you.  Are you game?”
     “Certainly!”
     I get their billing information, they get their login and password to the billing system and go in and enter a credit card like they’re supposed to.  The scam usually works when their credit card won’t bill, and they ask me to switch them to PayPal billing, which I do.  They don’t bother to pay that one, so I send them an invoice through PayPal.  They don’t bother with that one, either, and meanwhile, they change their passwords on their servers.

     It’s really annoying, trying to do business with people whose faces you never see, or people who are too far away to get hold of and rip their arms off when they do something like that.

     Tonight, one of the standard “When I make money, you make money” freeloaders got an eyefull:

Mark says:
Man, ya know, it’s really bugging me lately. I’m a consultant. It’s what I do for a living. And I just can’t just answer and fix servers for free all the time. I’m just not doing that anymore. It costs $xxx an hour, and I’ve given you something like 12 hours or more and you’ve always said, “When I make money, you make money!” Well, ya know, after a hundred times, it becomes bullshit.

Mark says:
Now fuck off.

Captain Asshat says:
hey!  but I’m not getting paid for this job!
have a nice life loser

Mark says:
Yeah, a loser who you keep asking to fix your servers for free.

     Really, knowing that Captain Asshat has never paid me a dime for the work I’ve done — even when he’s said he would — how could he expect anything less?  And, yeah, I have been a loser in the fact that I’ve lost every bit of revenue he’s promised after I’ve stupidly prioritized him above customers who actually do pay their bills.
     So maybe I’m a loser — he’s still a deadbeat.

     And why should I listen to, “That’s poor customer service!” from an asshat who hasn’t even been a customer?  I mean, by definition, customers usually pay. 

     So, Captain Asshat, seriously…  As far as “Customer Service,” my skills are absolutely excellent — ask any of my customers who actually pay per agreement. 

     Now, it’s not that anyone has to pay me to be nice to people.  It’s just that… well… I’m friendly.  I’m extremely helpful.
     As a matter of fact, I’ve been too nice.  Too helpful.  Too willing to let too many people take advantage of me.

     As far as my business goes … That ends now. 

     I’m more assertive when I’m working for someone else, and I’m not when I’m working for myself.   That’s a fact.
     There’s a point where you have to be an asshole, and start weeding out the freeloaders.  That time past a long time ago, and I have a lot of catching up to do.  *evil grin*

     And if you’re not paying me to do any of my “outstanding” work (your words, not mine), you’re gonna get what you pay for as far as “customer service.” 

“Well, I can feel the heat
from across the room
Ain’t it wild what a little flame
can make you wanna do…”
— Rascal Flatts, “I Melt“

     Ok, so I’ve been remiss in doing the Melee for a while… Here goes:

1. The Misanthtropic: Name something (about humanity) you absolutely hate.

     Some days, no matter what you do, no matter what you say, you just cannot win. Everybody has those kinds of days, and they suck. Fortunately, there’s tomorrow.

2. The Meretricious: Expose something or someone that’s phony, fraudulent or bogus.

     A lot of businesses these days wanna run themselves by doing absolutely nothing but blowing smoke up peoples’ asses. It starts from the top. They blow smoke up a manager’s ass about what they’re attempting to accomplish. The manager blows smoke up the employee’s ass that they’re doing an outstanding job when they have plenty of evidence that that’s not the case. The employees then blow smoke up the customer’s asses: “we attempted to ____ but…” (but didn’t), “we feel that we can offer you ____” (but can’t), “We’re sorry you’re unhappy, is there anything we can do for you?” (but won’t).
     Even worse is the whole “potential employee” category, where Management and Upper Management will blow smoke up the ass of every piece of riff-raff that comes through the door. “Oh, your resume is outstanding!” “Yes, you’re a perfect fit in our organization!” “We’ll get the offer letter out to you by the end of the week!” But it’s all smoke and mirrors.
      Business cannot work this way. This is a bullshit, fuzzy-feeling mentality that does nothing but dash hopes and create a customer base who will quickly become impatient at spending their hard-earned money on pipe dreams while getting absolutely nothing in return.

     The exact opposite of this is the service industry business which focuses purely on “new business” instead of taking some care of their existing clientele. I’ve said it a billion times: “What good is new business if you can’t keep it?” Most “first deals” will not earn a dime. Repetition is where that kind of business earns capital. Customer Service is mandatory to stay in the black.

3. The Malcontent: Name something you’re unhappy with.

     I miss my Wildcat.

     Painfully so.

4. The Meritorious: Give someone credit for something and name it if you can.

     Exactly 52 weeks ago today, Fracas started doing this Monday Melee thing.  Kudos on a year of Monday Melee!

5. The Mirror: See something good about yourself and name it.

     Some days, I can write.

6. The Make-Believe: Name something you wish for.

     I found out what “home” is.  I wish I could be there all the time…

Now it’s your turn.

You can take part in The Monday Melee, even make it a regular feature at your site by visiting The Monday Melee page and following the steps. Kick-start your brain on Mondays and meet other bloggers.