Author Archive for Jewel White

Monday Melee from Julie for 02/04/2008

February 4th, 2008 at 4:19 am by Jewel
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Fracas' Monday Melee1. The Misanthtropic: Name something (about humanity) you absolutely hate.

It’s risky business, hating something about humanity, as it can lead to more dangerous drugs, like self-loathing. Today, however, I’m in a brave mood, so I’ll take a stab at hating voyeurism, or better yet, gossip. Is there no cure? Okay, I think that’s enough hating for one day.

2. The Meretricious: Expose something or someone that’s phony, fraudulent or bogus.

Good Mourning, It’s MondayI think oxymorons are bogus. For instance, we love to say ‘Good Morning,’ knowing there is really no such thing. I’m going to protest against Webster’s Dictionary and insist they start spelling it ‘Mourning.’  Mournings suck, and I can speak from experience now that I have joined the world of day-shift employees, or associates, or whatever HR insists we are called these days. Having to go to bed early, and not quite managing it, and therefore never getting enough sleep… how could anyone call that good? Honestly, I’m just mourning my bed, so please, STFU.

3. The Malcontent: Name something you’re unhappy with.

I’m unhappy with the Monday Melee. I can’t write the Monday Melee on Monday. I have to sit here on my wondrous Sunday nights, after my most awesome weekends, and pretend like Mondays are acceptable days of the week. Mondays are not acceptable. Mondays are mournings. Please see number 2.

4. The Meritorious: Give someone credit for something and name it if you can.

Exactly 53 weeks ago today, Fracas started doing this Monday Melee thing.  Kudos on a year and one week of Monday Melee! (Thanks Mark, and Fracas.)

5. The Mirror: See something good about yourself and name it.

Some days, I can read what Mark writes. (Mwahahahaha)

6. The Make-Believe: Name something you wish for.

I wish Mark would stop dissing our home on Monday Melee! What’s wrong with our home, Dude?

Now it’s your turn.

You can take part in The Monday Melee, even make it a regular feature at your site by visiting The Monday Melee page and following the steps. Kick-start your brain on Mondays and meet other bloggers.

The Monday Melee from Jewel for 06/25/07

June 25th, 2007 at 6:05 am by Jewel
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Monday Melee

1. The Misanthtropic: Name something (about humanity) you absolutely hate.

I really hate when coworkers taunt one another. Why are some people so incapable of accepting their own faults and weaknesses that they point out every fault and weakness in someone else as a ridiculous attempt to feel superior? I’m the fearless leader who gets to build a team with young’uns like this. Where’s that play pen?

2. The Meretricious: Expose something or someone that’s phony, fraudulent or bogus.

Coke adds life. (Would you believe me if I told you I haven’t watched TV, or commercials, in a really long time?) Coke used to add life, before the Moral Majority got ahold of the recipe. Now all Coke adds are big hips, zits, and tooth decay.

3. The Malcontent: Name something you’re unhappy with.

Cat hair notwithstanding, I really hate being confused over the appropriate use of the ‘b’ word versus the ‘c’ word, like there is anything appropriate about either word. Big thanks to Mark and Zacque for clearing that one up for me.

4. The Meritorious: Give someone credit for something and name it if you can.

The Shakespearean Insulter… dis ‘em with style.

5. The Mirror: See something good about yourself and name it.

I don’t have a ‘special purpose,’ but I am bright enough to consult Freud’s library and learn to deal with the envy.

6. The Make-Believe: Name something you wish for.

I wish for a hammock under a thatched roof, a Calypso band, and a plentiful supply of Goombay Smash.

Now it’s your turn.

meleesmall.jpgYou can take part in The Monday Melee, even make it a regular feature at your site by visiting The Monday Melee page and following the steps. Kick-start your brain on Mondays and meet other bloggers.

Monday Melee from Jewel for 06/18/2007

June 18th, 2007 at 9:29 am by Jewel
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meleesmall.jpg

1. The Misanthtropic: Name something (about humanity) you absolutely hate.

Nouns. Nouns and adjectives. Nouns, adjectives and gerunds. And dangling participles. Dangling participles really piss me off. C’mon man, f*ck, dude and buddy. Don’t make me break out the thesaurus just to get my point across?
Mwahahahahahahaha! Luv me sum Zacque.

2. The Meretricious: Expose something or someone that’s phony, fraudulent or bogus.

Nathan Fillian, (Malcolm Reynolds, beloved Captain of Serenity) does NOT wear underwear under his kilt, and I’ll have words with anyone who disputes this self-evident fact.

3. The Malcontent: Name something you’re unhappy with.

My psycho-kitty is shedding EVERYWHERE! Couldn’t I just vacuum her coat… just once? Please? … and maybe a little tumble in the dryer?

4. The Meritorious: Give someone credit for something and name it if you can.

All Hail to Divalicious! Keep me rolling, Mama.

5. The Mirror: See something good about yourself and name it.

I dunno about good, but it’s honest and accurate. I am a well-spring of unsolicited advice. NE1 gotta cork?

6. The Make-Believe: Name something you wish for.

I wish for what everyone wishes for. Love, Mark to get Sex, Money, Mark to get Sex, Fun, Mark to get Sex and a RETURN of really cool prizes at the bottom the Cracker Jacks (you young’uns weren’t around yet when they were really cool prizes, like tiny cap guns and weeny whistles) And we all wish for Mark to get Sex… Zeesh

Now it’s your turn.

You can take part in The Monday Melee, even make it a regular feature at your site by visiting The Monday Melee page and following the steps. Kick-start your brain on Mondays and meet other bloggers.